David, approaching the Philistine

I Samuel 17:37

The LORD who delivered me from the paw of the lion and the paw of the bear will deliver me from the hand of this Philistine.

O Lord, you created me with eyes that see the world, with ears that hear the sounds, with an intellect that can evaluate the proportion of things, and instincts that act on these evaluations. What do I see, O Lord? I see a man approaching who is massive, covered in powerful weaponry, carrying a massive sword, and wielding a massive spear. As I walk here, I take all this in with a mind that is as equipped to process it as any man who ever lived. I am not insane, nor am I willing to take unreasonable risks with my life. I am David, your anointed one, son of Jesse, of the line of Judah, the line of the scepter, the line of ruling, and I have eyes like every man.

O Lord, I see also the worldly confidence of my enemy, a man like me, with eyes like me, who can evaluate and compare. He looks upon himself and he sees unbridled power, a power that has made him a champion, for he is strong.

The proportion of things is simple, O Lord, and only a fool would let it pass by unnoticed. I am a boy, young in my strength, and though I have skill, I have an inclination to war and an ability in it, I have powers in keeping with my size, my youth. So it goes. He is a warrior hardened by long experience, who towers over me, in strength superior, in ability he far exceeds me, and thus in analysis he does not fear.

This is the calculus taken by my men, the men of Israel, those who cowered in their camps like pagan men when he rode forth in his superiority, challenging the manhood of my people, or I should say, the Godhood behind our manhood. For implicit in his challenge is the superiority of is god, that is the god he has made, that they as a people have made, this god an idol of silver and gold, made by man, and thus of the earth, lower, beneath them, they god above gods, and hence the test of their superiority is the strength they can put forth, and embodied by Goliath, it is indeed glorious in the eyes of men.

Measure strength against strength if you are wise. Were we pagan men, we would be wise to cower here like fools, fearing the superior power of Goliath, or in treachery to devise some method to overcome his strength, measuring ourselves against ourselves. Fools! We are not pagan men. We are the men of Israel!

My reaction when I first heard his cry was the shock of a heart possessed. After all, God has long been my prize and treasure, since first I heard of him from my father's lips, a glory peeking through his words and the account of his promises. What was evident to me even then was the power of God, his ability, for the stories were no more than long accounts of his power and the men that trusted in it. Is this not our heritage, the heritage of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob? Did not Noah trust in the word of God and his power when he built the ark? Did not Abraham venture on the power of God when he left Ur? These patterns seem so clear to me, so evident in the words we have clung to these long years. God's power and our trust in it. Every commended man has seen this, and every fallen fool has questioned it. Hence at the heart of things is an atheistical unbelief, a doubt. Doubt is the great enemy of our trust, let there be no question.

Doubt there was in the hearts of the Israelites when the shuddered back from the ancestors of this man I face. Doubt there was in Aachen's heart when he hid from God (note the absurdity of such a thing!) his stolen treasures. Doubt also in Esau's heart when he surrendered his hope for a mess of pottage. Doubt of God's power is the failing of all men, and in each situation doubt springs up anew, its edges felt even at the corners of my present action.

O yes, Lord, I tremble now in my heart as I walk. O Lord, with these eyes and these senses, I fear, for the man before me is huge, his strength superior. In my flesh, I am nothing more than all these men that tremble too, despite my declarations. This is no feat of screwing up my courage, as a man does who enters a situation he knows will be painful. I cannot, I do not, ignore or forget the physical calculus of what I face.

Who is this man, that he should defy the God who lives? The living God, the God who is there, this is the great hope of the Israelite people, the great hope of Abraham's descendants, for we do serve a God that is living, and if he is living than he acts, and if he acts than he causes, he creates, he determines, he rules. The Lord is a ruling God, a God who does not back up from man, but in whose hands man's heart sits. It is God who has hardened this fools heart, and it is God that has made mine supple within me.

O yes, O Lord, you have made me supple, you have heard me, responded to me, walked with me. I have faith, yes, I have faith, because you have placed it there, shining in forth in your word and proving to my heart your power. I see, I see, not the created realities of my earthly eyes, those that even the idols possess, but I see the uncreated reality itself, the power seeping from the edges of all creation, the power that is displayed day and night in the heavens, the power that convicts all men, from which the cower under the created idols of the world, Goliath, satisfied in the strength of his flesh, though one day he will die like every other man.

Thus goes the analysis, I seeing him in his strength, seeing also my self in my proportional strength, him confident, and I non-confident in this flesh. But I have information, knowledge, which he does not possess, because it is a knowledge that only my eyes can see, his cannot. It is a secret strength, the strength proven when I in this same flesh overcame a lion and bear, this secret strength which is so far beyond any worldly power, that when confronted with opposition it can laugh, it can scoff. Goliath sees me and laughs, but the proportion between my strength and his is insignificant compared to a greater proportion, his strength and the Lord's.

When he comes against me, O Lord, he comes against you. My actions are not foolhardy but wise, trusting as I am in a power that cannot fail. The Lord will show himself glorious, and those who trust in him cannot fail, for his words bind him to their defense, O Lord, this is faith, the connection between your spoken word and our venturing on it, this created thing which the glory of his Word brings to life, O Israel, hear and understand! Have faith men, for the God who stands behind these words is the Maker of Heaven and Earth! He does whatever pleases him, no can hold back his hand, and the created power of Goliath is like the grass of the field, no more! Lord, make my feet swift as I run now, guide my hand as I fight, for the battle belongs to you and I am no fool!