Top Five Most Cringe-inducing Verses from the Message Translation of the Psalms

1. Psalm 1:1

How well God must like you— you don't hang out at Sin Saloon, you don't slink along Dead-End Road, you don't go to Smart-Mouth College

2. Psalm 84:12

He doesn't scrimp with his traveling companions.
It's smooth sailing all the way with God-of-the-Angel-Armies.

3. Psalm 27:1

Light, space, zest— that's God!
So, with him on my side I'm fearless,
afraid of no one and nothing.

4. Psalm 19:2

Madame Day holds classes every morning,
Professor Night lectures each evening

5. Psalm 29:4

God's thunder tympanic,
God's thunder symphonic.